We are winning…really?

Today has been a day full of reflection for me.  Much of it has to do with the one year marker of my mom passing away, but much of it has to do with what God is doing here at Pleasant Valley in our youth ministry.  In short, we (the Kingdom) are winning!

One of the ways we measure success/wins in our ministry is by watching/listening/sharing/participating in stories of life transformation.  Over the past 8 weeks we have had 9 students share their stories in our Wed night services.  During our “Secrets” series, we had a young lady talk about being sexually assaulted and the eating disorder that followed, we had a young man talk about his jump into pornography and the fight to get out of it now by God’s grace, we had 2 high school students from Liberty HS talk about the activity of the Holy Spirit in their lives recently and challenge us to “be present”, we had 2 high school students from Liberty North HS share with their peers last week, and then last night we had a moving night of 3 high school guys from Oak Park HS sharing their stories last night.  Listening to the progression last night of a student who has grown up in church, one who has strayed, and one who was continually invited by a friend for the last 5 years to come to PV, was a terrific moment.

We have had students commit to memorizing James (a 7th grade girl has the first 2 chapters done!) during our series for the month of November, we are out of space for our HS students on Sunday mornings, and terrific stories coming out of virtually all of our 12 different homes for home groups.

To top it all off, I will get to make some pretty cool staff announcements in the coming week as well!

We talk a lot about seeing the transforming influence of Jesus unleashed in PV, the Northland, and Beyond.  In the life of a student, their family, and their school.  Make no mistake that the vision God has placed on PV is one of heavy responsibility and it seems that for every story of triumph there is one of brokenness.  But God is calling us to be faithful to our calling and let Him do the redemptive work of transformation in the hearts of students.

Here is what I can unequivocally say right now…We ARE winning!

 

3 months

Today is February 17th. A pretty awesome day outside for mid-February.  It’s also been 3 months since November 17th.  That day was a sharp contrast to today.  Some of you who know me will connect the dots, but if you don’t it has been 3 months since my mom passed away.

These last 3 months have been filled with a lot of hurting but also a lot of healing.  It is often said that time heals all wounds.  I don’t think that is very accurate but I do realize that time creates distance from all wounds.  Talking with a friend the other day about my spiritual journey and I have to admit it is hard for me to understand where I am because things are pretty different now.  Here is a raw dump of confessions.

I still listen to the voicemail on my phone from Mom.
I still begin to call her number to see how she is doing before realizing she won’t answer.
My 4 yr old began crying randomly at bedtime the other night because she missed her Granny.
My 14 yr old still wears her Granny’s wedding ring to remember her.
I saw someone the other day that startled me because she looked like my mom.
I have a different and better understanding of how to be there for people when tragedy hits.  It has made me a better pastor.
I get paralyzed by grief more than I would care to admit.
I realize anew how blessed and rich I am.
Jesus is all that matters.  He makes all things new and He makes everything beautiful in its time.

In my desire to grow and be more like Jesus, the unchartered waters ahead in my life cause a lot of anxiety.  He is also patient with me, waiting and walking with me through this growth period.  Sometimes I feel really guilty for feeling this way when I realize in places like Haiti death is constantly knocking on the door of every family.  Famine, disease, unclean water, etc. are daily circumstances that have to be dealt with.

To be honest, I have thought a lot the last few months about how ready I am to go home-to heaven.  I long to see Jesus, to not deal with life here anymore, to just mail it in.  To put it bluntly I just want to give up.  But then again, I really don’t want to give up.   I want to see Jesus become more apparent in my life.  I want to be able to say I have endured and embraced suffering for Him and to have sacrificed for His Kingdom.  So many things going through my mind but to sum it all up, I would just use one word. Thankful.

 

“The Sing-Off” and views of Christianity

You know how you get a mental image of something when you hear certain words?  If I say “carnival food” many of you think of cotton candy, funnel cakes, corn dogs, and sno cones.  That is one example.  Another might be if I say “politics”-very rarely does that conjure positive mental images!  Last night my family was enjoying the NBC season premiere of the reality show “The Sing-Off” where groups sing a cappella and are rated by judges.  The last group to sing was a group called “Committed” that is really a group of guys who are devout Christians and the video introducing the group to the viewing audience left me with a pit in my stomach.  There was nothing wrong with the video, in fact they all seemed like really classy guys.  Maybe that was part of the problem.  Too often the view of Christianity seems to be overtly clean cut and out of touch with reality.  I was desperately hoping these guys wouldn’t come out singing “Amazing Grace” or some other Christian song or hymn.  Instead they shocked everyone and rocked the house with a Maroon 5 song.  Today I wonder why I had that “Oh no, not again…” feeling before they performed.  Maybe because too many times the view of Christians seems unreal to many people and not even desirable.  I found myself wishing for Committed to just not embarrass the rest of “us” and hopefully the judges would be decent enough to them.  Where have believers gone wrong?  I don’t think I’m alone in how I felt about Committed before they performed.  Many people-no matter what they believe about Jesus-were probably thinking similar thoughts as mine.  Christianity obviously tends to have an image and perception problem.  I am really not sure if it is even possible to change the tide of the perceptions people have about Christianity, but obviously it would be terrific if when the word “Christian” is uttered the mental images you have in your mind are diverse instead of divisive, compassionate instead of condemning, integrity instead of ignorant, and listening instead of loud-mouthed.  I wish I would have been thinking that Committed would rock their performance instead of hoping they wouldn’t get booed.  In reality, what and how I think is just a microcosm of the bigger perception and problem of American Christianity.  I pray we would all work to change that-not so we are liked but so that Jesus is glorified.

 

Is God enough?

I struggle.  Daily.  Hourly.  Ok, I admit it, I live in a constant struggle.  Some of you have witnessed my life and you are thanking God for finally enlightening me to this fact that you have been well aware of for quite some time.  Let me share my struggle-let’s see if you can relate.

I have a problem thinking God might not be enough.  You see I would never verbalize it that way, but we all know that actions speak louder than words.  To put it simply, I struggle with idolatry.  I used to think idolatry was just worshipping something other than God.  Now I realize that is exactly what it is but I am simply blind to the things I worship.  I want to believe that God is enough for me, but I am confronted that if that was really true then some things in my life would have to change.  My view of my leadership, my desire to be wanted and needed, my desire to be liked and admired, how I love my wife and girls, etc.  All of those things don’t necessarily seem like idols, but the minute I live my life to satisfy those longings over living my life for the glory and magnification of God, I am playing with idolatry.

I see it all around us also.  From the way people follow and obsess over their sports teams, to someone’s infatuation with education (yes, I believe we put that too high sometimes), to trading all the free time in their life over to playing a sport so they MIGHT get noticed and get a scholarship, to simply what you give up to get that new trinket (iPad, Droid, TV bigger than your kitchen table), it all seems to drip with idolatry.  Do I think desiring things and having fun and being smart is wrong?  Definitely not!  But I want to get to the point that I want God more than those things because then I can really be truthful when I say God is enough.

Idolatry is huge and every person struggles with it.  That isn’t a reason to dismiss it, it’s a reason to repent of it.  I pray that myself and all of us would struggle with what John the Baptist says in John 3:30…less of me and more of You.

 

Getting its time

I was reading in Ecclesiastes today and read over the text in chapter 3 I used at my mom’s memorial service and it caused me to think about a phone conversation I had with a friend the day after Mom died.  He told me about the experience of having his mom die but also as a pastor and the way he was wired he went into “task mode” making sure everything was done and taken care of.  I was doing the same thing.  I was making sure my dad was getting the information he needed from the funeral home, talking to my brother, the funeral home director, all of those phone calls (that I normally am not good at or enjoy doing) that needed to be made and arrangements made.  He reminded me of the “grief cycle” and passed on some great words of wisdom that I now see coming true.  ”Brad, grief will always get its time.”

The grief cycle of anger, sadness, bargaining, etc. has been something that I have known about and talked about with others going through a time of grief, however it is something totally different when it is you.  Inside, I really wanted to just shut the door of reality these past two weeks but grief is bigger and stronger than any of us.

It is funny how it happens.  One moment I am fine, but I will hear something that reminds me of Mom and I lose it.  It is like I have been hit by a Mack truck and I never saw it coming.  Other times I will see something or someone will say something  and there comes grief-least expected and definitely uninvited, but also very necessary.

Who knows how long it will last?  It seems like its timing is about as good as an unwanted case of bad acne-at the worst possible time it rears its ugly head  Yes, those words of wisdom are reigning true in my life-grief is getting its time…and that is ok.

 

Caught Looking

I decided to return to blogging not because of any desired recognition but because it is somewhat therapeutic for me and if my life can cause others to laugh, cry, think, or to help in some way then that is a bonus.

As a hitter in baseball, when you get 2 strikes you are coached and taught to swing at anything close to keep from striking out.  Sometimes the pitcher wins and you swing and miss and strike out. Other times, you get fooled badly and think the pitch is something different than what it ends up being and you let it go by and strike out looking.  The batter gets caught looking for something else and isn’t prepared for the pitch that actually comes.

In a nutshell, that is me right now.  Two weeks ago today, my mom went in for surgery to repair and bypass an aortic aneurysm.  A week ago yesterday, I did my mom’s memorial service after she died from complications during surgery.  Two weeks ago I was talking with my mom about Christmas and work.  Today, I would give anything to be able to talk to her at all.  This was nowhere on the radar screen and wasn’t even being thought about.  I was caught looking.

The last two weeks seem so surreal.  I am so appreciative of my fellow church staffers at PV, the awesome volunteers in our student ministry, my home group guys and all of our students, and my extraordinary family.  They have been supportive and lavished grace upon me that is impossible to put into words.  In all of this, I feel as unpredictably emotional as a 13 year old girl.  I am overcome with sadness one minute and the next minute I just don’t care about anything.  Last night I was pretty mad-mad at God.  There wasn’t anyone else I could be mad at so because He runs the show I aimed my anger at Him.  Actually I have been mad at Him since it happened.  So mad that even when I felt and sensed the comfort of His Spirit, I rejected it.  When I knew that the Scriptures wanted to comfort me I ignored them.  I wanted to hurt God just like I was hurting.  Today I realize how much I am blaming Him instead of thanking Him.  You see, before Mom went into surgery I had the privilege of being with her as she confirmed a relationship with Jesus-and I have the audacity to blame God instead of praise Him.  Then, with a supernatural confidence and an extra helping of grace, God gave me the ability to do Mom’s memorial service.  In the midst of being “caught looking”, it gives me comfort that the One who saw it coming grieves with me and is far more powerful than death itself.  For now, I am just doing my best to “keep my eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of my faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.”  Hebrews 12:2

 

Thoughts for parents of students

Parents,

Now that school has started and the routine of fall begins to set in a little bit, I wanted to take this chance to share some upcoming things with you and some encouragement.

There are many things that are planned throughout the fall-make sure you check out the calendar tab on www.lifestudents.net to stay in touch.

Home Groups kick off at their respective homes on September 12. Check the website for more details.

Beginning next week, you will get an email from us that is completely devoted to what we are teaching your students on the weekends here and specific ways on how you can further those ideas and teachings at home.

If you want to be in tune to what Tim and I teach on our Wednesday night services, you can check out the “Messages” tab on lifestudents.net and watch each week’s talk.  This Wednesday we are finishing up a series called “Unleashed” where we ask the question “What does it look like to see Jesus unleashed in your schools?”  This brings me to a point that I am especially passionate about-even more so because as a parent myself I have so much to learn in this aspect.

Last week the message on Wednesday night was about the question “What does it look like for Jesus to be unleashed in your family?”.  I began the night by asking 3 questions in both our Middle School hour and again in our High School hour.

1.  Are your parents followers of Jesus?  Most of the kids in Middle School and about 75% in High School raised their hands.

2.  Do you think your parents have an authentic, genuine relationship with Jesus?  Middle Schoolers were about 50/50 and so were High Schoolers.

3.  How many of you wish your parents were more passionate about their relationship with Jesus?  Easily at least 75% in both hours raised their hands.

As a dad, this hit me pretty hard.  What and where is this faith that I profess manifesting itself out in my life?  If I am not passionate about my relationship with Jesus, what is it that I am most passionate about?  Why is that an idol in my life?

Parents, here is one conclusion that I have come to.  I don’t believe our kids are expecting perfection from us-in fact I would submit that they really want to see brokenness in us (they wouldn’t verbalize it like this) and a reliance on this God that we say we believe in.  I sure do not know your son or daughter like you do as their parent, but I believe I have a unique perspective after a decade of working with students.  I believe that what they are desperate for and anxiously watching to see is for Mom and Dad to fall in love with Jesus.  To openly admit that you need Him.  To ask for His leadership in your life and in the life of your family.

We want to partner with you in this enormous responsibility of building godliness into your son and daughter.  Keep looking for events, suggestions, etc. that we will make available to just resource you and cheer you on!

Let us know how we might be able to help!

Your biggest fans!

Student Ministry Staff

 

Thailand Final Recap From Brad

I am sitting here in Narita Airport in Tokyo having a chance to reflect a little while waiting for the next couple of hours for our flight to Seattle. I just got Adam, Greg, Shawna, and Gina off on their flight to Detroit while the rest of us will disperse in our separate ways shortly. Here are a few ramblings and reflections off of 2 hours of airplane sleep.

I am so proud of our team. The way they engaged college students, kids in the slums, the young leaders at Immanuel, and kept a light-hearted but serious spirit of unity throughout the 2 weeks was extremely impressive. I have had the privilege of leading a few different teams and this team was well beyond their maturity. This makes me really excited for the future of these students! We have a couple of kids that feel God calling them to missions, some (all, really) having a renewed sense of the lost people around them every day, and everyone much more aware of the power of prayer. We had a terrific time of debriefing yesterday and talked about the challenges of coming home and re-entering the world that God has placed them in. They are a little apprehensive but confident in the God who lives in them. Some are worried no one will understand, that they will get frustrated with their friends that don’t "get it", that life will quickly take over again in spite of their commitments to do and live a different way. All of this is normal and if they will lean in to God, with your support and prayer, they will be able to take advantage of this trip as a lifelong spiritual stepping stone that propels their walk with Jesus to a different level.

I can’t tell you how appreciative I am for the adults on our trip. Steve, Shawn, Will, Ryan, Jan, May, and Adam were priceless the past two weeks and we would love it if you would continue to pray for the next 5 weeks because May is still in Bangkok for that amount of time. She is visiting family and desperately wants to use this time to love them to Jesus. We prayed last night that God would honor her request to see her family come to faith in Christ and would ask that you all pray the same way. I also want to let you know about a young man named Adam Kuntz. Adam went on this trip as a fellow staff member helping me lead this team as he has been interning in our ministry for the past 2 years. I can’t describe to you the fondness and admiration I have for him. This trip is somewhat of an ending of his internship and I will just tell all of you what I told him in front of our team last night. I told him that he really is no longer an intern-he has been acting and has proved himself as a full fledged youth pastor and it gives me great joy to send him out to finish his degree and build a Kingdom-minded youth ministry wherever God has called him.

I also want to share a little bit about Terry Collins. "Big C" as he is fondly called in Bangkok is a PV member who was broken a few years ago at the Leadership Summit and surrendered to whatever God wanted to do with him. Little did he know that his job created an opportunity to live in Bangkok and he has leveraged that to advance the Kingdom in great ways with Immanuel Baptist Church. Last night, his pastor at Immanuel described him as "my pastor" and to see the love and admiration the young leaders group he has mentored has for him is truly heartwarming. As a ministry leader at PV, it excites me to see someone such as Terry be so captivated by Jesus that they are busy unleashing the transforming influence of Him in Thailand. It gave me a picture of a life that is about the things we have said we want to be about as a church-unleashing Jesus!

I believe we are on the verge of experiencing more and more "God moments" in our ministry and in PV as a whole and I am excited for what is ahead! Thank all of you SO MUCH for going to battle on our behalf via prayer. We truly could not have been as successful without you and we realize that in a sense you have been on this journey with us and we are grateful.

Look for a date soon where we will invite you to come and hear and see our stories from this trip.

Because He lives,
Brad

The team gets back in four separate groups tonight! The first arrives at KCI around 6:20 and the others around 8:20!

 

Thailand Team: Final Ministry Day

Hello again!

Along with the information I already passed along this morning, here is an update about the team’s final day of ministry in Bangkok:

Sunday was the team’s final opportunity to do ministry with people of Bangkok. In the morning, they had a chance to help with two church services at Immanuel Baptist Church. The team was very excited to see that some of the kids they had worked with during their time ministering in Bangkok’s slums had come to church! Adam spoke during the early service, and then after Brad’s message during late service, the team got to preform their Freedom Drama. After church the team headed to the Baring slum where they got yet another opportunity to play games, love on, and share the Gospel message through the Freedom Drama. Over 20 kids accepted the Lord during the team’s time there! The story of one of the people who accepted Jesus as their Savior is particularly interesting:

Her name is Minaa and many of our Liberty High School students know her because she was a foreign exchange student at LHS last year. While here in America, Minaa and Hayley Barros became friends. Minaa called Immanuel Baptist Church to see where the team would be this weekend so that she could connect with Hayley again. Though the team had no idea she was planning to do so, Minaa showed up at the Baring slum and got to take part in all that the team was doing to minister to the people of that community. In an incredibly touching and exciting moment after the Freedom Drama presentation, Minaa accepted Jesus as her Savior! It was an AWESOME blessing for the team to see someone who came to a few of our Wednesday night services at PVBC and that they never thought they would see again come to know Jesus! God truly can do more than we could ever ask or even imagine!

Some praises:
Our team has been incredibly blessed by those from Immanuel Baptist Church who have been with them the entire trip. It’s been a great opportunity to work alongside other brothers and sisters from across the world. Gina was back to normal health on Sunday! The team as a whole has been relatively healthy and has maintained a terrific attitude throughout a busy and tiring trip.

Some Prayer Requests:
The political situation in Bangkok is one that is marked by instability. Be praying for that. Though our team leaves in a day or so, be praying for the on-going ministry that Immanuel Baptist Church has in the slum areas that our team visited. The team will spend tomorrow debriefing and preparing to come home. Because many of the students have never been on a mission trip before, this is a very important and critical step in their process of returning home.

The team will be debriefing and laying low tomorrow as the prepare to fly back to the United States on Tuesday. Let’s be praying for their safety during their long trip back to our side of the world!

 

Important Thailand Update

Hello All

Early this morning, (Sunday evening in Thailand) I received a text message from Brad letting me know that while the team was leaving the Baring Slum after a day of ministry, a bomb went off not too far away. No one from our team was injured in any way. Though they could hear the bomb from their van, they were not in the immediate proximity of the explosion. As you may or may not know, this spring the city of Bangkok was literally under a siege of political protest from a group called the "Red Shirts". Though the group was dissipated and the protests stopped, an election yesterday provided an opportunity for the group to try to make a statement. They chose to do so by setting off a bomb in the city. The team has asked that we pray for wisdom for them as they finish out their final day in the city.

They had planned to do some shopping in a mall that was near the bomb site. Those plans have been scrapped and the team will kind of lay low as the await their exit from the country on Tuesday. I have received word from Brad that about 10 people (none from our team) were injured in the blast, but that local Thai people have given our team the word that things in the city are ok. This being the case, our students and volunteers on the team will operate as normally as possible over the next 24 hours before heading to the airport to fly back to the US.

Your prayers are very appreciated over the next day or so.